a day in the life of a stay at home mom....

Spoiler Alert: This is NOT one of those post where a mom complains about all the disgusting things she has pulled out of her hair or how many times she's been puked on or how she had to fish a random toy out of the toilet with her hand. But yes, all of that stuff happens, daily. 

I've always rolled my eyes when moms complain that being a Stay-At-Home-Mom was the "hardest job in the world". I'm sure it's the same with most people when teachers complain about having a hard job. Those 6 weeks off at summer are really, tough, huh? And all those family vacations together; seems horrible. But it IS tough sometimes being a SAHM (since bloggers shorten everything), but not for the reasons you might think. During my first year, I had to take care of a baby on my own for about 7 hours a day and also try to run errands without a car or family/friends close by. But that wasn't the hard part. The hard part is that your life is completely consumed by your child. You can't eat, shower, pee, think, sleep without first thinking of your baby and that's exhausting. On top of that, most of the day you are spending your time at home with an awesome human being who you love deeply, but has absolutely no social or verbal skills to feed your intellect. And that is draining. So yes, it's awesome/amazing and exhausting/draining all at the same time. I'm thinking about what it's going to be like the second time around and remembering things that helped me. So here's a little advice....

My advice to all new moms:

-Get out of the house. Doesn't matter where you go, but get out of the house at least once a day. I always went on walks. Even when I didn't feel like it and only had 2 hours of sleep. Just go. You'll feel better.

-Make some friends with moms who also stay at home. Who cares if you have nothing in common with these women or you find some of them obnoxious? You just need to have some type of conversation during the day. And really really try to not talk about the baby. Talk about anything else, news, weather, celebrity gossip. I joined 3 new mom groups, maybe that was too much, but I needed it. I remember one day at a cafe with all the other moms, I looked around and realized we were from all different countries/backgrounds and honestly had nothing in common except we had babies the same age. And that's all you need.

-Brush your teeth and wash your face. If nothing else, brush your teeth. You may forget to shower, or put on makeup (ha! makeup.), or get out of your pajamas and wear "real" clothes, but do not forget to brush your teeth and wash your face.

-Get help. Ask for help from friends/family. Get your husband to be as involved as possible. I was very fortunate to have an incredibly supportive hubby who would gladly take the baby the second he walked in the door after a long day of work. I also had amazing friends here who would offer help/advice and I gladly took it. So don't try to be super-mom. And remember "it takes a village....."

Now with all this, I have to be completely honest. Things have totally changed. We have a car that I get to drive each day- meaning O gets a ride to work each day with a super awesome neighbor who we love love love for that.  We also have a Helper, which I feel needs a whole blog post to explain what this is like. Basically, she's our full-time live-in maid/nanny who does an awesome job with Caiden. But I'm still the mom. I'm the one who deals with  cares for my toddler when he's decided to paint the wall with his lunch rather than eat it or throws a massive temper tantrum complete with head-banging on the tile floor all because he's not allowed to watch t.v. So while it's easy/hard to stay at home, it's one of the best decisions I've ever made and I'm very grateful that I even had the opportunity to make that decision.

more books.

How do we have time to read so many books? When baby goes to bed, turn the tv off. 

Pretty hilarious and makes me feel pretty good about our travels so far. This book is a collection of essays written by different women from all over the world who have had nightmares on the road. Caiden hasn't been the best sleeper when we travel, but he's been an awesome travel companion. He loves being in cars or airplanes and will zone out to an iPad indefinitely. (I think the trick is that we never let him watch tv or play on the iPad so when there's a big trip this is a special treat.) Just when we were about to swear off traveling with kids until they are about 18, this quote from the introduction inspired me to keep going: 

Just when you think life can't get more depressing after watching a random world news segment, you find a book like this. Written about life in a slum in Mumbai which apparently is fairly accurate. The author researched the book by living near the slum for a few years and my friends who live in Mumbai said this painted a picture of slum life from what they have seen. I know people live like this because I've seen the slums in India with my own eyes, but it's still so incredibly shocking and just seems like it can't be true. It's really good to read stuff like this to keep things in perspective.

Since SG tv is so crappy here, we only watch the shows that we really want to watch rather than just having the tv on watching nonsense. One of these shows is GIRLS on HBO. I love this show. Her memoir is fairly odd. I think you have to really "get" her sense of humor to really appreciate it. If you like the show, then I'd recommend this read.

been a little busy...

Haven't been on the blog for a couple of months. Been busy with a toddler, working part-time, starting my Masters of Education, and of course there's this…..

This might be a more realistic picture of his true feelings. 

Summer in Canada…..about 6 months later….

After VA Beach, we flew up to Calgary and met up with some friends who had a BBQ/Pool party with all the babies. Great to see everyone and catch up.

LBC decided he would sit with the big kids. He only ate watermelon the entire time though. 

We also went to Stampede one day. Not quite as fun as last time, as we had 3 one year olds with us, who did little more than stare at the cows.

We stayed in this great little condo that was across the street from a cute little playground and park where we played each day. Thanks for the hookup, Jordana!

We then drove to Invermere and were kept busy visiting friends, farmer's market, did a little hiking, celebrated our anniversary, and of course, a week at Premier to relax and celebrate Caiden's birthday. I think the pictures speak for themselves. It was absolutely beautiful at Premier, as always. His "friends", Tala and Nora were there to help Caiden celebrate. They do recognize each other's existence, but that's where the story ends. One of the greatest moments was the baby mum-mum race. We placed 1 mum-mum cracker on the dock and set the babies down to see who would get it. They each had their own strategy and were all winners in their own way- except Caiden, he just sat there.

Not sure if he had a good time at his birthday, but we did! 

Book reviews.

It's been awhile but I've finally started reading again at night before bed. I'm DONE with parents/new mom/baby books. Ready for something real....

So I chose this book from the shelf. I'm pretty sure this was required reading somewhere in High School. Not sure if I read it then or not. I wanted a book that's really different from my every day life. Couldn't have chosen a better book for that. 

 Grabbed this one off the shelf and LOVED it. Really great, very interesting read about how some people have been successful in life and why.

Well, this one was on the shelf and since I liked the previous one, I had to try it. Not as great as this is a collection of essays that don't relate to each other. Some essays I loved and others were a struggle to get through. 

She's only really written one great book, in my opinion, and this isn't it. This one is slow and about a stay-at-home mom who discovers some butterflies and I have a sneaky suspicion it might have something to do with climate change. Oh geez, a bored stay-at-home mom. Probably not the best read for a bored stay-at-mom.

Ok, I caved and finished a "mom" book. Loved some of the things she said. Really interesting thoughts on comparing "American" parenting to the French. I do have to say that the "American" style she refers to does seem to be very similar to other cultures too. Good advice though. 

She might be one of my favorite authors. I love how she speaks about her faith in such a genuine way. Really enjoyed this memoir. 

Kinda became obsessed with this trilogy. I wrote about the first one in another post and of course had to finish this series.  Lives of women in Saudi. Absolutely fascinating and horrifying. 

Bali at Christmas

Almost here….. 

We've booked this villa in Bali with 2 other couples and a playmate for Caiden! Yes, we do go swimming almost every day and can walk to the beach in Singapore, BUT there's something so nice about getting away. 

Virginia Beach

We had a great time in VA Beach with the grandparents. Took him to a water park, play grounds, the beach, carnivals, baseball games, etc. He loved my parents dog and we spent some time out on the lawn playing. Since they live on a golf course, O took the opportunity to find some great deals on cheap golf.

I love finding old photos. 

 Carnival on the boardwalk. 

Baseball! 

 He did not understand that he could only choose 1 duck….

Playing on the front lawn. 

 doggie. 

afternoon at the beach. 

 My dad's 60th birthday and the 4th of July. 

Loving the playgrounds and parks.